Specials Gift: February 2011

Initial Discomfort

Monograms can add that perfect crowning touch of elegance to your wedding cake.

Or, they can look like this:

Proof that sometimes it's better to quit before letting your five-year-old write on the cake.

Still, it could be worse.

The monogram could match the rest of the cake:

Hey, it's not easy to make tinfoil look this good.

If you do find a mistake in your cake's monogram, don't panic. There are plenty of seamless ways for your baker to fix the error.

This isn't one of them.

Now, I'm all for sharing new words, broadening folks' horizons, furthering education, etc, but if you have to explain to the baker of your wedding cake what a monogram is - a "T, J, and H" put together, for example - then maybe, just maybe, a few alarm bells should go off.

Or I suppose you could just take your chances.

After all, what could go wrong?

Heh.

Aheh.

Heh.

At least the quotes add a little something "extra."

Thanks to today's wedding wreckporters Anony M., Hilary R., Cyndi P., & Cyndee M., who think all bakers should be required to ask, "Can I quote you on that?"

Contempoary-style accent tables in brushed aluminum

Koba 2 cocktail table

Nova will introduce a collection of new accent table designs at the High Point Market, April 2 to 7. The Lucky 7 Pedestals and the Koba Collection will be on display in the company’s showroom in IHFC Commerce Building showroom C403 alongside many new lighting and wall designs. The Koba 2 Cocktail table (left) has a brushed aluminum base and a root beer finished table top with beveled glass top. It measures 15 inches tall by 37 inches wide by 37 inches deep.

The Kova end table (below) is a squared wood design featuring a brushed aluminum base and a 24-inch by 24-inch beveled glass top. It is 24 inches tall.

Kova end table

Lucky 7 Pedestals (below) are made of brushed aluminum and come in three sizes: small (30 inches by 14 inches by 8 inches), medium (36 by 14 by 8) and large (42 by 14 by 8).

Dallas Market Honors 2 Retailers For Giving Back

Dallas Market Center named two winners for The Next Big Give, a national search for specialty retailers who give back in their communities: Brown, Houston, and Tea & Magnolias, Tulsa, Okla. The winners were selected from more than 50 retailers that are involved in a variety of ways through volunteering, raising funds or donating goods.

Both retailers offer significant support to worthy organizations and communities. We thank them for their good work and hope their stories will inspire other retailers to do the same,”said Bill Winsor, president and CEO, Dallas Market Center.

Brown, located in Houston, is owned by Jill Brown. The home furnishings retailer put its entire 2010 advertising budget towards two events benefiting uniquely different organizations: Future Farmers of America (FFA) and Yellowstone Academy, a Houston-area college preparatory school. Jill Brown felt that it was more important to put funds towards the needs she saw in her community rather than towards promoting her business through advertising.

Spurred by a belief in American ingenuity and hard work, Brown hosted FM 2490 in October 2010, which raised awareness for the FFA. Brown’s party Chandeliers and Champagne, benefiting Yellowstone Academy, included a live auction that raised close to $30,000 for the school. Yellowstone received 100 percent of the proceeds.

Tea & Magnolias is a gift and accessories retailer located in Tulsa, Okla. Owned by Susan Ponville, the store extends its generosity far beyond its immediate community to the Amazon jungles of Peru. Inspired by her past work as a missionary in Peru, Ponville sells jewelry and purses in the store made by Peruvian women with all of the proceeds going back to help the women support their families.
Also, in order to help the Tulsa community, each Christmas Tea & Magnolias hosts a Christmas Home Tour, giving all the proceeds to Pathways Adult Learning Center, a local school for special needs adults. The store also sells crosses that are handmade by a group of special needs adults in order to fund the group’s activities.

After receiving more than 50 applications, the entries were narrowed down to 10 finalists and then two winners by a panel of industry experts and Dallas Market Center representatives. The winners will receive a complimentary trip to the March 24-27, 2011 Market in Dallas including round-trip airfare and three nights hotel stay. While at Market, The Next Big Give winners will be recognized on Thursday, March 24 during The Inspired Event, a cocktail party including raffles benefiting charitable causes.

For additional information on the contest visit www.dallasmarketcenter.com/give.

Oscar's Sunday Sweets

In honor of the Oscars tonight, I've put together a collection of Sweets representing each of the top nominees for Best Picture.

[Opening envelope] And the nominees are...

The Fighter

By Palermo's Bakery

As Mal Reynolds would say: shiny.

Black Swan

By House of the Rising Cake

Just imagine a much darker, hallucinating cake counterpart lurking right outside of frame.

Toy Story 3

By Iced Over

Lots more detail and in-process shots here!

True Grit

By mrm71

Not the best photo, but check out the amazing details in the brick, nails, and rope:

The Social Network

Found via @zfarmville, baker unknown

Oh, like you use Facebook for anything else anyway.

127 Hours

By Mike's Amazing Cakes

Granted, I went a little abstract on this one. If you want a better fit (and have a reeeeally strong stomach), then you could always go with this cake instead. But don't say I didn't warn you. ;)

The Kids Are All Right

By Small Things Iced

Do Mr. Bump and Miss Giggles fit this title perfectly, or what? So cute!

The King's Speech

By Francesca

With cakes this gorgeous, it certainly is.

Inception

Made by Cory of Rosebud Cakes

Because Inception and Salvador Dali are a match made in heaven.
Or maybe just crazy dreams.

Happy Oscar-watching, everyone!

Have a Sweet to nominate? Then send it to Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com.

A Wrecky Double-Cross

I've got a special treat for you today, guys: My friend John Gjertsen likes making double crostic puzzles, and recently he made a special Cake Wrecks one. If you're a fan of word puzzles then I highly recommend it - and if you need an extra carrot [smirk], I can tell you that the solution will give you a sneak peek at The Next Big Thing for Cake Wrecks. (Ooooh - mysteeeerious!)

Click the image below to download the full-size puzzle:

Oh, and no sharing answers in the comments! Lest I be forced to call you a "cheater cheater pumpkin eater!" And believe me, no one wants that.

Saturday special: social media

"Tweeting Your Way To Business Success" is the title of a blog post at Jola Interactive. The author writes: "social media marketing is well worth the investment because, when executed properly, your organization will excel."

Read the entire article here.

Happy Mothers Day Personalised 400 Piece Jigsaw - £29.99 ($48.52)

Our fantastic Personalised "You're The Heart Of Our Home" Mother's Day Postcode Jigsaw is a unique and fantastic postcode-centred map jigsaw puzzle perfect for Mother's Day! Simply provide a postcode and we will create a unique personalised jigsaw centred on your mums home. Our Personalised "You're The Heart Of Our Home" Mother's Day Postcode Jigsaw comes in a choice of map designs and is available in 400 piece millboard or luxury 300 piece wooden versions complete with charmingly shaped pieces that spell 'Happy Mother's Day'. Read more...

A Matter of Life and Death

Sure, the Oscars are this Sunday - but all *I* see is a handy excuse to quote one of my favorite movies ad nauseam.

Let's begin, shall we?

This doesn't bode well.

That's also the only Oscars wreck I have, so from here on out it's all booze, guns, and gangster talk. Woohoo!

Thank you. But don't call me "boss."

Hey, are you still packin'? Fork it over.

I mean that literally.

It's like disarming Germany.

If Germany had one giant icing bullet and a bunch of smaller, cupcake bullets, that is.

(What, you couldn't tell those were shotgun shells?)

(Of course I knew! I just had no idea!)

You're just saying that because of the guns. And don't call me "bosss," either.

For Dr. Poole ("'Allo!") we have this treasure trove of linguistic anomalies:

And such nicely rounded dipthongs.

In fact, I'd say these wrecks call for a celebration!

But don't worry; we only keep this in the house for yacht christenings.

Matthew C., Aimee W., DB, Jennifer W., Robert K., Rachael F., & Marian R., let me show you the door. THERE'S THE DOOR!

Oh, and if you're completely lost right now, I'd suggest starting here.

Happy Mothers Day Personalised 300 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle - £49.99 ($80.88)

Colorful aprons, kitchen towels, pot holders

Peking Handicraft Inc. (PHI) introduced a new line of kitchen textiles by licensee Ellen Crimi Trent. Trent's designs for Peking Handicraft are done in five colorful designs. All the styles boast a whimsical look, using bright, bold colors and a fanciful duck adorned in a chef's hat.

The classic statements "Sugar and Spice," "Kiss the Cook," "Bon Appetit," "What's Cookin'?" and "Never Trust a Skinny Cook," enhance the look of all aprons and kitchen towels found in each style.

All of the designs are offered in four coordinating pieces: standard apron, half apron, kitchen towel, and pot holder.

You Talkin' To Me?

Remember, bakers: It's never polite to ask a lady her age.

Writing it out on her birthday cake is perfectly ok, though.

(Also be sure to emphasize the "Old Woman" part; seniors LOVE that.)

Oh what a difference a missing "t" can make:

And you thought that high school nickname would never catch up to you.

Don't worry, Julie; I'm sure the baker just had a "wisp!"

I've been short for as long as I can remember, so I can say with some authority that this is why you should always order the *regular size* birthday cake:

Also, according to a t-shirt I saw once we're not "mini," we're "fun-size." So there.

When celebrating a lucky couple's recent engagement, it helps to say something complimentary:

And also to remember that "monkey" and "lucky" sound exactly the same in Wreckerator.

According to a recent survey,* "Pop-Pop" is the number one nickname for adorable grandfathers. (Awww.)

Guess what number two is?

Thanks to Cindy J., Erica L. & Erin P., Julie W., Gary L., Joann B., & Koby, who are talking to me, and actually do find me amusing. So that's seven.

* Which I just made up.

Personalised Name An Orchid Gift Pack - £19.99 ($32.45)

What a wonderful way to show you care! Simply register your chosen orchid tree name on the Exotic Orchid Registry and the the help of our 'how to grow' leaflet grow and nurture a beautiful Orchid Tree to commemorate or celebrate a loved one. Read more...

Thorntons I Love Mum Cups - £2.99 ($4.85)

Simply say 'I Love you Mum' and show how much you appreciate your mum this Mother's day. These delicious milk chocolate truffle cups are filled with a smooth truffle filling and pre-iced 'I love mum'. They don't just look good, they taste good too. Contains 5 individual chocolates. * Standard UK delivery (dispatched within 1 working days plus 2-4 days to be delivered) * Next day UK delivery (if ordered before 12.00pm Mon to Fri, excluding bank holiday, its dispatched that day and delivered the next working day) * Saturday UK delivery (if ordered before 12.00pm on Friday, its dispatched on Friday and delivered Saturday before 1pm) * Unfortunately early delivery (before 9am) is not available for this product * Unfortunately our Thorntons chocolates are only available for UK Mainland shipping. * Food items are non-returnable. This does not affect your statutory rights. Read more...

Throntons Mothers Day Heart - £9.99 ($16.22)

A beautiful gift for the World's Best Mum! The perfect Mother's day gift: Thorntons timeless favourite chocolates, including caramel, nut, fruit and fudge presented in a beautiful heart-shaped box. Add our luxurious organza gift wrap and present this to your mum to show her just how much she is appreciated this year. * Standard UK delivery (dispatched within 1 working days plus 2-4 days to be delivered) * Next day UK delivery (if ordered before 12.00pm Mon to Fri, excluding bank holiday, its dispatched that day and delivered the next working day) * Saturday UK delivery (if ordered before 12.00pm on Friday, its dispatched on Friday and delivered Saturday before 1pm) * Unfortunately early delivery (before 9am) is not available for this product * Unfortunately our Thorntons chocolates are only available for UK Mainland shipping. * Food items are non-returnable. This does not affect your statutory rights. Read more...

Free Printable for St. Patrick's Day

I wish I had the time to create this myself for you... but it's not happening right now!! So... I am passing on this darling free printable to you from THE ladies in Vegas. Simply click on the picture, follow the directions to print, frame (or modge podge onto a board), and you have yourself a modern & fun St. Patrick's Day decoration. Perfect.

Mine is happily sitting on my entertainment center now. Love it! And best of all, I feel like I am "on the ball" having a St. Patty's Day thing already up in my house! And I didn't spend any money! Wahoo.

Cupcake liners put style in the kitchen

Sutton Gourmet Paper offers eight designs of its cupcake baking liners. Each set of 50 baking cups is packaged in a round, clear plastic container. The container protects the shape of the liners so they bake perfectly. The company also sells in bulk to bakeries and professionals, as well as provides wholesale tubs to culinary retailers. It is a new exhibitor at next month's Housewares Show in Chicago.

Company founder Kellie Sutton says cupcake baking liners need to be "colorful, grease-free and look beautiful using only one liner. Our whites stay white, the colors are vibrant and the designs are crisp."

Wreck Reaction

Guys, I think the Wreckerators are on to us.

Yep, while we've been focusing on all the actual *cake* wrecks, bakers have been industriously wrecking just about every other item in the bakery, and then some.

How else can you explain "The Brownie Ball?"

It's a giant ball of icing with brownies stuck in it.

I kid thee not.

Now, do I want to eat this?
Of course I do.
Does that make it excusable?
No, it does not.

Hey, just because *I* don't have any self-respect doesn't mean bakers shouldn't.

Or, if you prefer your giant ball of icing rolled in sprinkles and served on a cookie platter:

Perfect for the children of someone you hate.

It's not all sugar and sprinkles, though. Hoooo no. See, unfortunately, the deli guys decided to get in on the "decorating" action, too.

BEHOLD!

Billy Bear Bologna:

And you thought nothing could make chicken mcnuggets look healthy.

The world's cheesiest gingerbread man:

"Oh noooo!"

Yes, that's really a cheese "ball." Decorated with icing.
Because cheddar & buttercream = Gouda upchuckin' fun!

And finally, for that perfect Beetlejuice-inspired treat...

Pineapple upside down shrimp "cake:"

SWEET MERCY I THINK ONE JUST MOVED.

Hey Amanda, Erin M., Zoe R., Nicole B., & Brittany B., ~~daylight come and~~ me wan' go home.

[Update: the final "cake" has sparked a lively debate in the comments, so perhaps this video instructional on making a "Smörgåscake" (submitted by Marcus B.) will help.

Just kidding; it won't. But if you want to see a guy yelling instructions in "Swenglish" and violently throwing ingredients around, then it's pretty funny.]